I LOVE MY HAIR...you should too!

" You ain't human without fear"

Never be bullied into silence. Never allow yourself to be made a victim. Accept no one's definition of your life; define yourself. ~Harvey Fierstein

Passing

Race has been the common topic of many of my recent conversations, and recently this lead to a brief discussion about passing; when a Black person is light enough to pass for White. Post convo, I've been thinking about these individuals who are are able to pass. While it is a societal benefit (to some) it seems like it would cause some deep identity issues and personal strife. I can't even imagine having to reject or neglect my culture as a means to "get by" in America.

I took this thought to another level and removed race. What do we pass for daily? Happy? Strong? Outcast? Strange? Flawless? Our identities are constantly being compromised in order to fit into what the world says we should be.

My advice, don't get so lost in what you are passing for that you lose or neglect who you actually are. If you're not happy, don't be. I'm not saying be a walking storm cloud, but we should be honest with ourselves, our feelings, our emotions, our past, and our futures.

...but what do I know?

To be nobody but yourself in a world which is doing its best, night and day, to make you everybody else means to fight the hardest battle which any human being can fight; and never stop fighting. ~e.e. cummings, 1955

Always be a first-rate version of yourself, instead of a second-rate version of somebody else. ~Judy Garland

We are so accustomed to disguise ourselves to others that in the end we become disguised to ourselves. ~François Duc de La Rochefoucauld

Too Much...

So this semester I am taking 2 similar classes that have riled my inner activist: Equity and Social Justice (ESJS) in Education supported by Community Psychology. A few people on my campus know that I have been on an "Everything wrong with society today can be traced back to slavery and the Europeans" kick. This acknowledgment is enhanced every class when yet another social issue is presented to me in Community Psych after I explored the historical context of social issues, sometimes the same issues earlier in ESJE...no, it does not help that I have both classes in the same day, twice a week. Any who, these built up emotions have led me to create another blog with the direction of connecting today's social problems, primarily in the African American community, to slavery and the tactics used to maintain control in this economic system. The purpose of this dissection is not to create an excuse for our community or to place full blame on any one party. However, I do believe that slavery is an even/lifestyle that we tend to date as if we no longer share a connection to it. The trends of slavery are still very relevant in our lives and the only way to know that we are moving away from it (although the times my show we are regressing back to it) is to assess its actual role in our lives today. This blog will be up and running withing the next couple weeks as I organize my own information and feelings towards the topic at hand. Please note, that while my opinions will be based on true events, I am not conducting any extra curricular research to back up my statements. Just the words of an insider observing from the outside.

...until next time, stay true to you.

What if...

Alright, play with me for a second. This is a proof that I had to respond to for my Community Psychology class:

If you awoke one day to discover that gender equality had miraculously been achieved worldwide, what would you notice? What would be similar or different?

After reading the question, I immediately knew my answer. I'm pretty sure I answered the question, but here is my response:

The Land of Gender: Equality for Some

Good morning world! The sun is shining, the birds are chirping, and males and females are equal. Women no longer have to fight for sufficient wages for equal work. There are no longer any debates about who actually owns a women’s body. That’s right; a woman does have the right to choose whether or not an abortion is right for her. The number of stay- at- home dads has actually risen because moms are out working hard to support their families and the men in their lives don’t mind. Rape and domestic abuse rates have decreased and there is actually a woman running for President without receiving wardrobe criticism. Everyone is now free to be educated and international women no longer need to feel like their husband’s property. While the rights of the child are usually placed in the hands of the mother, more men are receiving custody of their children. To the same token, chivalry is dead. There is no longer a need for “ladies first” because if men can get the doors for themselves, so can women. Life is going to be great from now on in the land of gender.

Gender inequality is an issue that I believe is one of the most fought for. Regardless of race, ethnicity, age, region, or economic status, a woman is a woman; if nothing else, that is something that all women have in common. It is for this reason that if I awoke one day and all was equal in the land of gender, my life would continue to be filled with inequality because I’m still black.

While gender equality is important, I do not believe that equality in this one area will solve other inequalities in the world. In fact, I believe that with gender equality, individuals will be allotted more time to focus on other differences and inequalities such as race and socioeconomic status. For some people gender equality is two steps forward, but other factors bring them five steps back. In the documentary “Say My Name,” many of the artists drew attention to the struggles of females in the music industry. However, there was also much talk about the difficulties that they shared by being black and living in the hood; as if being a woman isn’t difficult enough. A segment that resonated with me was the statement made by Estelle regarding the two primary images portrayed by black women in the music industry: “you either have to be Mother Nature with a hair wrap or be dressed sexily with weave down to your butt.” This is how the media defines the success of a black woman, and because of these mockeries and false standards, black women are not taken seriously. I completely agree with Estelle and appreciate when positive representatives, such as her, are being heard and making a societal impact.

Another common disparity mentioned in the film was economics. Many of the women discussed poor childhoods, insufficient child births, and violent encounters in their neighborhoods. While the argument can be made that their lives were more difficult because they were women, many from single parent homes, there are still plenty of men in these poor neighborhoods experiencing similar events. One common goal that was held between these various artists was to get rich and get out of the hood. One woman mentioned that “if you don’t get out of the hood, someone will always be there trying to take you down or get rid of you.” I do not suppose that this mentality is held because she is a female, but because of her environment, and I presume that a male would share the same mentality. When it comes to environment, Remy Ma also mentioned the goal of breaking the generational cycle by refusing to be a product of her environment regardless of her educational status or what she was born into. Some would call it being “born into failure,” but positivity comes out of impoverished areas daily.

While my position may seem pessimistic in the eyes of a feminist, I do not make this argument to down play the identity of a woman. As a black woman it would be foolish to value one part of my identity without mentioning the other. I also believe that many individuals gain their strength from the very fact that they are a female. However, I believe that it is fair to say that gender inequality will continue to progress at a faster rate than racial and economic inequalities. Even with the miraculous occurrence of gender equality, I do not foresee gender equality being the trailblazer for all other discriminations. So while the life of a woman may improve, it will never be carefree.

I just turned this in this morning, so we'll see what the teacher says. I don't think it's half bad...

...but what do I know?

*SURPRISE?*

Now, I know that I just posted a semi-angry/frustrated piece, but I had to share my two-cents on this one. I was just casually browsing through my Facebook News Feed when someone's freshly updated status read:

Surprise trip to Africa!! Be back Wednesday!!

...

Who the heck takes a surprise trip to Africa??

...and for less than 3 days?

Ok...now, I must admit that I am a tad but green with envy. I would love to travel back to the motherland, and I plan to, but it will take quite a bit of time for me to save up for the excursion.

As I reread the jubilant status, I just pictured the ease one must be filled with to enjoy such leisure at any moment. It must be nice to look outside and notice that it is about to rain and just hop onto a plane to an area with a more desirable climate. Or to wake up one morning with no plans only to discover that it's all been taken care of and just like that, you're out the door and on your way to France or Milan or maybe the summer house. It must be really, freaking nice to live off of your parents pretty penny instead of having to, lets say...work and save for an experience that very few, if anyone in your family can say they have shared.

While I would love to up and leave whenever the thought popped into my head, I also enjoy the feeling of working towards a goal and accomplishing it...for example, saving money for a trip and being able to enjoy the fruits of my labor.

I don't mean any harm.I was just really taken aback by this tiny peak into this... lifestyle.

I do apologize for the continued bats of anger. Hopefully I will return in a more sane and collective manner...

...but what do I know?